The loneliness of a stay at home mom

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Being a mom is to me the most wonderful thing in the world. And I’m sure most of the moms say the same thing. I’m a mom because I wanted to be one, I wished my whole life for it, and I’m thankful every single minute for it. I have a family I adore and I wouldn’t change anything in it. Seriously! With all that said, I don’t considered being a mom a job. But I do, though, consider being a Stay at Home Mom a big job and to tell you the truth, one of the most difficult jobs on the planet.

Don’t get me wrong for saying this, but it’s a really lonely job and only the person who did it knows what I’m talking about. It’s a job that gets into your hear and makes your feel so lost sometimes that is hard to explain to another person unless he/she has been a Stay at Home Parent. I really love it and I think it’s important for my son to have one his parents present almost all the time. I had a mom that stayed at home with us and so did my husband, so we really appreciate that. To tell you the truth, I never appreciated much what my mom did until I became one, but that’s another story. I actually never understood how hard it is.

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I do want to make clear that I do value moms that go to work too. I think it’s great and sometimes I am even a little bit jealous that they get to get. But what I mean is that when you stay home all the time with your kids it can be extremely tiring and lonely. You have to find a way to interact with a toddler and keep busy for basically 12 hours a day. And you also feel constantly guilty because you’re always so tired.  You miss having adult conversations that are not about kids and at the same time you feel like you don’t know how to keep it up a conversation for too long that are not about kids. I consider myself a person that up to date with the main things happening around the world, I read a lot, and I have my own opinion and thoughts about many subjects that are not kids, but it scares me that I master talking about kids for hours!

It’s a constant conflict in my head (and I know its in a lot of moms head out there) that we somehow lost our value. I know this seems crazy and we’re doing a wonderful job staying home, but deep, deep inside we have this crazy conflict and we feel like we have no value to anyone else. Deep inside we think less of ourselves. Writing this seems confusing and stupid, because I do know I have a kid that needs me and values me. I have a husband that understands and supports me staying home with our son. So it’s stupid so write all this… but the feeling of loneliness and the feeling of being lost are there from time to time.

So my only “advice” if you’re staying home with your kid is to hang in there, you’re not alone! And if you’re not, next time you see a Stay at Home Mom give her a big hug and be sincerely appreciative of all she does. It’s not easy, it’s not relaxing, it’s tiring, and crazy. Still… I wouldn’t change for anything in the whole world.

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